After four and a half hours of supervising kids ages 5-9 doing their homework (one needed help with fractions, another wanted my undivided attention when she had to read her library book aloud, another was sitting quietly in the corner and I was fine with that… until i realized he wasn’t even doing his actual homework, but instead copying the text of a comic book word-for-word), and trying to make sure each took their showers (no one wanted to take theirs first, fighting over bath toys, and the youngest one bawled that she didn’t want to take a shower, she wanted to take a bath), and constantly trying to pull them off each other so they wouldn’t rip each other’s throats out, I firmly believe that I am not ready for kid. I will never be ready for kids. They belong in zoos.

Tags: i am hoarse